Out of the Blue
Isn't it odd how sometimes something happens just out of the blue? Something that you had been thinking about but were either too lazy or too scared or too unsure to do anything about.
In the last 16 years I have moved so many times that the places become almost a blur....and the people....well sometimes I find myself thinking that I have caught a glimpse of someone and then realize that it could not be that person because they live elsewhere.
I knew one city, one street, one house until the time that I turned 19. Since then I have known 5 cities in 5 different states and 9 different apartments, cottages, townhouses and houses. We won't bother to count the temporary places as such...the week to month spent living here or there waiting for a place to open up. This for a person who needs such deep roots in order to not blow over (you might have noticed the pic I chose for my profile)....along the way I also learned something about roots...I now carry them with me no matter where I end up.
But anyway all of that isn't what I am thinking about really. An event just happened to bring it to mind. What I am thinking about is a strange piece of mail that I received in Thursday's post. I check the mail everyday....well okay almost everyday. It seems that almost everyone has abandoned the dying art of letter writing...you know pen to paper not keyboard to enter/send. So occasionally there are a few days that go by when I don't check the mail. I won't be expecting anything so I just don't bother looking. Thursday I stepped out the front door to check that huge often times empty black mailbox and pulled out the usual. Or at least what as first glance looked to be the usual. Flyers and advertisements...a magazine....a catalog....a bill....and a single 5 x 6 white envelope addressed to me.
This envelope had had an adventure of its own. It listed my full name and my old address which had been marked through along with a yellow sticker from the post office for my general delivery address which had been marked through along with a handwritten current address which is how it finally reached me. At first I thought it might be a thank you from my brother from his wedding. (I really must see to it that everyone has my current address....just been too lazy) However, when I turned it over to open it I realized the return address was Roseville, CA Now that is NOT my brother. In fact I don't recognize this address nor this name at all.
Very curious now, I open it and pull out a single card. Like a postcard...a black and white advertisement is what it reminded me of. And the thought that went through my head was "oh now who has gotten my name from a mailing list and what crazy thing are they wanting from me" but the card had nothing on its back...just these pictures and a few words. I realized finally that it was a birth announcement. But I don't know these people! The name is not familar at all. Why would I have gotten this? It really puzzled me. Gave me an odd feeling like I should understand this but I didn't. These proud parents announcing a birth to a stranger....very odd, don't you agree?
He is a beautiful baby boy as newborns go. Strange little creatures that you want to hold and protect, but that somehow seem to have something behind those eyes....something wise to tell you if only they could speak. But they always keep their mystery to themselves. The background picture is obviously this little one gripping his mother's finger and then over that is a picture of his solemn little face in one corner and below that a picture of the happy little family of three in a private moment gazing at the baby. To the right is a strip of photos...the loving father with a bald head of his own, muzzling the babe's bald head.....bare little feet, toes out stretched...a loving mother craddling the babe, leaning down over him in profile. And that is when it hit me. The woman is gorgeous and happy but at first not familar to me...but that face in profile is familar! It is a friend that I have lost contact with probably 8 years ago....3 states ago...4 addresses ago.
Somehow she had taken the time to try and track me down. I had continued to run ahead like I seem to be always doing without leaving an advance warning. I have thought about her quite often. I have wondered how she is doing. I have thought about trying to track her down. She has one of the best hearts that I know. I have been upset with myself that I haven't kept in touch with her. She isn't the only friend that I have lost track of (having to leave others breaks my heart and so sometimes I almost pretend that they were another life time...silly I know). And here she was in a sense at my front door.
It is needless to say that I immediately dialed information. There was no listing for them! Damn this age for the technology that keeps people easy to reach and impossible to track down! All the operator could tell me was that she found no listing for them....perhaps it was unlisted...perhaps they had just a cell phone. No matter, I couldn't dial her in my excitement to catch up on all the missed years. So instead I will put pen to paper and revive the dying art of letter writing. Because if I don't make this effort I will never forgive myself.
A voice from the past, out of the blue.
In the last 16 years I have moved so many times that the places become almost a blur....and the people....well sometimes I find myself thinking that I have caught a glimpse of someone and then realize that it could not be that person because they live elsewhere.
I knew one city, one street, one house until the time that I turned 19. Since then I have known 5 cities in 5 different states and 9 different apartments, cottages, townhouses and houses. We won't bother to count the temporary places as such...the week to month spent living here or there waiting for a place to open up. This for a person who needs such deep roots in order to not blow over (you might have noticed the pic I chose for my profile)....along the way I also learned something about roots...I now carry them with me no matter where I end up.
But anyway all of that isn't what I am thinking about really. An event just happened to bring it to mind. What I am thinking about is a strange piece of mail that I received in Thursday's post. I check the mail everyday....well okay almost everyday. It seems that almost everyone has abandoned the dying art of letter writing...you know pen to paper not keyboard to enter/send. So occasionally there are a few days that go by when I don't check the mail. I won't be expecting anything so I just don't bother looking. Thursday I stepped out the front door to check that huge often times empty black mailbox and pulled out the usual. Or at least what as first glance looked to be the usual. Flyers and advertisements...a magazine....a catalog....a bill....and a single 5 x 6 white envelope addressed to me.
This envelope had had an adventure of its own. It listed my full name and my old address which had been marked through along with a yellow sticker from the post office for my general delivery address which had been marked through along with a handwritten current address which is how it finally reached me. At first I thought it might be a thank you from my brother from his wedding. (I really must see to it that everyone has my current address....just been too lazy) However, when I turned it over to open it I realized the return address was Roseville, CA Now that is NOT my brother. In fact I don't recognize this address nor this name at all.
Very curious now, I open it and pull out a single card. Like a postcard...a black and white advertisement is what it reminded me of. And the thought that went through my head was "oh now who has gotten my name from a mailing list and what crazy thing are they wanting from me" but the card had nothing on its back...just these pictures and a few words. I realized finally that it was a birth announcement. But I don't know these people! The name is not familar at all. Why would I have gotten this? It really puzzled me. Gave me an odd feeling like I should understand this but I didn't. These proud parents announcing a birth to a stranger....very odd, don't you agree?
He is a beautiful baby boy as newborns go. Strange little creatures that you want to hold and protect, but that somehow seem to have something behind those eyes....something wise to tell you if only they could speak. But they always keep their mystery to themselves. The background picture is obviously this little one gripping his mother's finger and then over that is a picture of his solemn little face in one corner and below that a picture of the happy little family of three in a private moment gazing at the baby. To the right is a strip of photos...the loving father with a bald head of his own, muzzling the babe's bald head.....bare little feet, toes out stretched...a loving mother craddling the babe, leaning down over him in profile. And that is when it hit me. The woman is gorgeous and happy but at first not familar to me...but that face in profile is familar! It is a friend that I have lost contact with probably 8 years ago....3 states ago...4 addresses ago.
Somehow she had taken the time to try and track me down. I had continued to run ahead like I seem to be always doing without leaving an advance warning. I have thought about her quite often. I have wondered how she is doing. I have thought about trying to track her down. She has one of the best hearts that I know. I have been upset with myself that I haven't kept in touch with her. She isn't the only friend that I have lost track of (having to leave others breaks my heart and so sometimes I almost pretend that they were another life time...silly I know). And here she was in a sense at my front door.
It is needless to say that I immediately dialed information. There was no listing for them! Damn this age for the technology that keeps people easy to reach and impossible to track down! All the operator could tell me was that she found no listing for them....perhaps it was unlisted...perhaps they had just a cell phone. No matter, I couldn't dial her in my excitement to catch up on all the missed years. So instead I will put pen to paper and revive the dying art of letter writing. Because if I don't make this effort I will never forgive myself.
A voice from the past, out of the blue.
posted by Erika at
12:56 PM
2 Comments:
Wow.
It's true, about the letter-writing the old-school way.
No one does it anymore, but it's the best way I and my family have of keeping in touch with my sister, who's doing study-abroad in Germany.
I hope you get in touch with your friend and revive the friendship. It's a great thing to do.
By
Anonymous, at 9:08 PM
Did you write your friend already?!
Loosing touch with friends is something that makes me terribly sad. I mean really, really deeply sad. This loosing touch, loosing connectedness is sometimes like a physical pain.
I am happy to have a number of friends in the first place, but it is constant source of sadness not to be able to keep touch with them all, e-mail, IM, Skype etc. notwithstanding.
And all too often, I am the one to blame. That makes it even worse. I try to counter it with a Buddhism-like calm ("letting go...") but it won't help every time.
I am often too weak, to unorganized, too unattentive, too much focused on daily worries to connect to a larger number of friends. So far I have not found a way to become better in that respect.
But the good thing is that sometimes someone is doing a thing like your friend does. Out of the blue. And I noticed also that when I attempt to re-connect to a long-lost friendship, most of the time I get positive results. (Disappointments also happen.)
But I think in our hyper-mobile times full of opportunities for reinventing ourselves, living new lives, moving to new places, meeting ever more people, we just have to accept that most friendships won't last forever.
Since I am 19, I lived in exactly 10 different places, 7 different cities, 2 of them in Japan. I now live in my hometown (Munich, Germany) again. It is a strange feeling but also good to get back to my roots.
What was the quote again from that wonderful "class of 97 - wear sunscreen" speech:
"Understand that friends come and go, but with a precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle because the older you get, the more you need the people who knew you when you were young."
I know this is an old one but it is a nice way to put it.
By
Anonymous, at 12:22 PM
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