Voices

I have heard so many voices in the last few months. And no! I am not talking just about the voices in my head, although I will not deny the existence of such. The fact is that the voices of others have just been so loud for the last few months. The incessant voices have drowned out many of my own thoughts and quieted my own voice for a time. At first I was most annoyed, at least until I made the realization that it just might be possible that those voices had a stronger need to be heard than myself.

Some of these voices were very familiar, others were totally new. A couple where voices from the past. Some were yelling, screaming voices while others were crying even sobbing. A few sounded quite melancholy or perhaps just resigned. Worried, scared....oh just the whole gambit of human emotions. Some rocked my own thoughts while others weren't even worth the oxygen which they were using up. (I'm sorry but that is reality....my air is precious! It is a joke but "Please move away, you are breathing MY air!)

The problem that remains to what to do with what I have heard. Some of it was very simple and easy to acknowledge...acknowledgement being all that was needed. Other voices are not so simple. In fact for some there is no answer at all....perhaps none is needed, at least not from me.

It has taken me a while to process all these voices and I still am not done. But I have decided that it is high time that I speak with my own voice again. As directionless as it might be by times. It is my voice nonetheless. I will continue to listen to the voices of others mostly because I can not help myself but also because I don't have many gifts to give but my listening ear is easily given. (The price at times for myself might be high but that is mine to control, no?)

Okay enough rambling, the point is after a bit of a break I believe I am back ready to speak my own voice, changed a bit by the loud voices hopefully for the better. We shall see.